Alone, but Not Lonely this Valentines

My sister and brother-in-law celebrated the holiday by joining a group of couples for a progressive dinner that ended with dessert at their house Saturday night. Rather than bumming around the house with the babysitter or (as Bridget Jones would say) spend time with “lots of smug married people” I decided to have an outing to the city.

I made plans to meet up with a friend and her sister in Brooklyn to eat dessert at the Chocolate Room around 7 or 8, but she had to make an emergency run to Ikea (what an emergency run to Ikea entails would have to be a post of its own). For the purposes of this post the Ikea run left me with a few hours to kill. I ate hot dogs with some random friends I ran into during an evening session at the temple. Our happenstance group parted. I took a subway to Times Square for a quick look around and then headed to a jazz bar in the village.

I pulled up a barstool in the corner, ordered a “Virgin drink. Something fruity.” And sat down with my juice to enjoy music and people watching. An older German speaking couple, a flamboyantly gay man trying the wine before buying, a waitress upset about her low tipping table, a bald old Asian man dancing while playing the electric guitar, and the circus of bartenders running around pouring, shaking, and serving drinks were all part of the entertainment.

Between sets the female half of the “older couple” went to the restroom while I felt ready for another drink. I stood next to her empty stool trying to catch the eye of a bartender. The male half of the “older couple” started moving his partner’s coat and offered me the seat.

I said, “Oh. No. No thanks I have a seat” motioning to the seat behind him.

He continued to move the coat and offer the empty bar stool and in a thick German accent said, “When an attractive woman comes by. You always offer her a seat.”

I smiled at the silly notion of sitting between this gray haired man and the gay guy while the poor woman in the bathroom would be left sitting on the other side of the old German, the one at the end of the bar. “Isn’t your...is that your wife?...in the bathroom?”

“Oh she’s not my wife!! She’s not even my girlfriend!! We’re not...uh...” He seemed mortified that I would assume they were in a relationship! “No, I am a kind of tour guide. She is on a tour. She is like my client. We’re both in this tour group. And we were just having dinner.” He couldn’t spit the words out fast enough!

“Well, I just wanted to order a drink. But they’re not looking over here.” I said, nodding to the group of chatting bartenders. “Thank you though.” I finally caught the eye of one of the bartenders, ordered a glass of Coke and walked back to my seat in the back.

Near the end of the set the couple stood and put on their coats. The man looked over to me. With a look of longing he said, “It’s a shame you’re here alone.”

“Oh no. I’m meeting up with some friends later.” Showing him the cell phone in my hand, “They’ve been caught somewhere. So, I’m waiting to meet up with them.”

He waved his hand as if batting away the 'lie' he thought I told, shook his head and gave me a once over glance as if thinking to himself, “if only I was a few years younger.” He said, “A young woman as attractive as you...It is a real shame.”

I smiled and bid them a good night and a good stay in New York. The pleasantries were reciprocated and they left.

I leaned back on the wall behind me and smiled. While I may look a bit pathetic drinking alone, I was quite content with my solitude.

Just Can't Shake the Marriage Lecture

Tonight's FHE lesson was given by Eve, my four year old niece. Over dinner we asked her what she wanted to do for her lesson and she said she wanted to "read scriptures" and play Hullabaloo for her lesson.

Eve set up Hullabaloo while Jana, my sister, and I got our copies of the scriptures. However, when it was Eve's turn to teach she stood up, walked over to the end table, and started pulling magazines off the stack saying, "Wait, I'm not ready." She pulled out a copy of The Friend, opened the magazine to random page that had a picture of the Salt Lake Temple, and said, "We're going to talk about temples."

Brooks, my brother-in-law, asked her, "OK, what do you want to teach us about the temple?"

Eve, "You get married in the temple."

We couldn't help but laugh a little as Jana winked at me and said, "Well, I guess this lesson is for Liann."

Eve continued with dignity as her audience tried to hold back giggles. She talked about how you get married in the temple "because then you have children and start a family." She took a short topical detour to Joseph Smith's First Vision. Tried to re-find the page with the picture of the temple, gave up, and then concluded the lesson with a reminder that when you marry in the temple "God blesses you." We then played Hullabaloo, had a closing prayer, treats, and played a different game for our real activity.

Singles ward or no singles ward, somehow God still manages to slip the marriage talk in there somewhere.

Don’t have a grocery store nearby? Don’t worry there’s a Starbucks right around the corner.

I think Starbucks sustains life in New York City. There is at least one (if not 2 or 3) within a 2 block radius from almost any point in the city. And they seem to have plenty of business when I walk by. I’m not sure if the city planner was involved, but seriously I wonder if the city would just shut down without a regular supply of Seattle’s best coffee.

Liann the Yoga Teacher

Well, it’s over. My month long intensive yoga teacher training is finished.

While I sat with my fellow yoga teachers in our last circle together I felt myself getting quite emotional. However, in classic Liann style I couldn’t express any of it in the moment. (Before any of you laugh out loud I’ll explain.) I tend to express my day to day emotions with copious amounts of words, but when they run deep I find it difficult to say much at all. Later that night I found myself on the train ride home crying into my journal as I tried to write what I felt.

As I sift through my emotions the words that stick out most are: Gratitude, deep and enduring gratitude. A glowing, radiant, yet peaceful happiness. And finally a great deal of sadness that comes with the end of anything beautiful.

Ever since I made this decision, people have asked, “Why a yoga teacher training?” And my answer tended to be a rambling one. While I had my reasons, when explained in the light of casual conversation they just didn’t sound that convincing.

But I never expected to feel the way I do about this last month. So much so that I’m even having a hard time expressing it here. While I think my last few blog entries have been a bit clever they dance around what has been really going on in my life.

So, here it is, for all you avid readers (don’t worry I’m not that delusional about how many there are of you). I AM A YOGA TEACHER (well almost. I’m one take home test and two homework assignments away from being certified). And while I never expected my life to take such a “hippie” turn, I’m very grateful it did.

Rats

I met my first bonafide New York rat the other morning. I was walking on 55th Street between Park and Lexington as I saw this skinny rat scurry right past me! I’ll admit I jumped and maybe even yelped. He wasn’t as large or fat as I expected a New York rat to be. I mean I saw much fatter Indian rats—although I think those rats may benefit from the Hindu principle of ahimsa (non violence).

Interestingly, Aliza (a friend from the yoga training) told me that the population of New York rats is large because they are able to navigate the grid system here. I find that idea very fascinating somehow.